This is what I am thinking about today. Why is it so difficult for people to see how connected we are? Who are you, what are you made of, we now know it is stardust too, cool! They just found another skull and scientists think it is a NEW species, wow, but then, so what. While I think ancestry is interesting, does it really change anything, does it make you feel superior knowing your relative from long ago was Napoleon, it's fun, but so what. What does your DNA say about your health, longevity, allergies, every molecule, every cell is fascinating, but so what. Let's add football to every night of the week, so we can watch this competition between humans, and get all excited, or any sport for that matter, we love the battle, but so what. Work life, we struggle, we compete, we get money, we strive to be the best, so what. Need to reproduce, you need a spouse, you need a family to take care of you as you age, you need someone to make you feel good, worthy, happy, or not? You need to dress up every Halloween your entire life, or not? Silly or serious, is it all really, OK?
Here you and I are, on this planet, spinning around together, so, so what? I think science and philosophers finally agree, our soul and our body are two different things. So what does that tell me? Well then everything is a choice, nothing is not up to us, our lives are our own and ours only, or is it? Is it my age, that has me seeing and contemplating more, that nothingness and everything are the same, the sea of humanity, has been a giant playground that we are supposed to participate in fully without fear, because what the heck, it is a speck in what we consider time, my soul will dance with yours after, it probably did before, the me now, got here. So does it really matter that I want to leave the planet, and those who I have come in contact with, better for having been with me? I think so. When I look into your starry eyes, I should see the wonder, the connection we have been given in a great Love, so great and vast there is no fully conscious comprehension of it. We keep falsely "thinking" I need to be better than I am now, or than you, to be worthy. You can have fun and know we are the same anyway. I can feel "it" humming in the background, singing in the background. When I pay close attention it can take my breath away, make my heart pitter pat, dream the dream. So what if you screw it up, really bad, so what, you get to make that choice, it is ok, make another choice, and another, oops, yikes, whee..... You are still going to be loved, because you are! This is just our serious, silly, wild human experience. Everyone of us is the same embodiment, a spoke in the wheel for now, but we will whirl back together, and set off again to create something, in the magical Love we are. Just do YOUR thing, other's will do theirs, it is OK. So thanks for being you and me! So weird, yet today, it seems so right. I should probably not turn on the TV, ah, so what, I love Sunday Morning. ***
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Last weekend was my little town and church's 150th Anniversary, so the scene is set for 3 days of celebration. We have carnival rides, music, parade, food vendors and dinners, all class reunion, and so many games and contents, pies, ugly cake, beard, legs, volleyball, bags, cribbage, cow pie drop, a showing of quilts, even a murder mystery and history tour. It is a flurry of people all ages wandering through out our main street and park. The weather was perfect. The atmosphere joyous.
This year I spent more time than usual at the fall festival because it was special, and I got to be a servant at the murder mystery dinner and a judge for the men's legs contest. Both were new things to me. I took a backseat and watched others play a three hour game of who did it, it was fascinating to watch people get out of their comfort zone and "play act". That started my journey into "observing" my surroundings in a more profound way. I really took notice of the families, many I no longer know, as our town has changed in residents as kids grew up, people retire and leave the planet. It surprised me again that passage of time and how it impacts our surroundings. The biggest surprise was the goosebumps that just did not go away, some call them Godwinks, when you are in such a joyful state your body simply can't contain itself and your skin jumps up for joy too! I was blown away with the level of joy and fun going on around me, it was palpable. Laughter everywhere, hugs everywhere, I got them again now just writing about it! That is powerful, feeling a sea of humanity in harmony, I got all verklempt, many times! I feel so grateful for my life, so lucky that I got to live here with these people, worked with my hubby here, raised my boys here, breathe in this country town air in all it's silliness and strife. It is story, but never the full story, our lives are simply only our own to know. It ended with my church doing a special worship service where six of our past pastors came together and participated in the joy of our long journey. If you thought I was verklempt the past two days you should have seen me on Sunday. It was a packed house, the choir (who is always awesome) had extra's join in that shook the timbers, songs soaring to the heavens, and I am not kidding, our angels were there, I was lifted up in love and was not the only one crying for joy. My favorite song and my Mom's ended the service, Go Now in Peace, and I could. These moments I can conjure up when I need them now. So I am thankful for all the participants in our village, being "together" made all the difference. it helps me love everyone! I love you! I hope you feel such joy, feel such peace, and are not afraid. It is the most wonder filled time. The Midwest took a huge hit in flooding again this year. Whole towns have been swallowed up, and may not reappear. Disasters abound at an alarming rate. Landscapes are changing, geographically, politically and socially. Some say it is a dark day. I can attest I have seen some disturbing signs in the agriculture ranks as well. I used to witness more honorable actions and compassionate expressions of kindness and understanding. It hurts my heart to say, that I see an increasing regard for money and status, whereas in the past, it seemed only folks we knew had low self esteem, would opt for lying about what an animal brought at auction, or their genetics. It isn't that in ag you felt ethically above other industries, it was just that your hopes and thoughts are so often conversing with God, you had more grace to give I think.
So what is happening now? Is the work too hard, mentally or physically, is witnessing the high dollar farm sales to developers and big business, then watching those people go off and relax and travel tugging at your heart now? You feel you deserve a break from the barrage and misconceptions about the industry? We see new laws that don't understand the true repercussions of their existence, because they are based off of emotion and not enough fact finding or calculations? The finger pointing seems too much. People spouting off instead of taking the time to look inside themselves and figure out truly why do they think this way, is it right, is it about Love or Fear. We all struggle with this, we are one in this tug of war, it always begins with me and you, not them over there. So what do I want. First, Love of self so I can truly be at peace and love others for exactly where they are, without judging them. I have not walked in their shoes, if you have been told all your life something is blue, you are not going to for a second believe otherwise, unless, you are open to a new possibility, am I open minded enough, are they, is it worth a conversation, or just a hug? Second, think/feel and be present enough, to give "it" the time it's due, estimate the impact, and find a smile in it. Damn it, I do make a difference. And, yikes, these two "wants" give me enough to focus on, for like, ever. So much easier to spout what I really don't like/want in the moment:
Well, I can positively affect climate change in some area, my yard, my house, my family, my thoughts. I can do it. I can love you without even knowing all about you. I just need to keep practicing. Baby steps are just as good as giant leaps, dang life is a miracle, for goodness sakes, we exist here, on this wonderful, mystery of a planet, in a massive universe, there, I feel better already. How could I have forgotten the beautiful, miracle of us? Now, My little ol soul is dancing in the light, cause this is not all there is, and we are all gonna be just fine. I am hugging you virtually right now! I so love kitties, their independence and attitudes make for some very interesting personalities. They are lower maintenance, although like smart dogs, know how to give a payback if displeased, and you will surely know why it happened.
Rosemary my childhood cat was a relaxed, pliable fluffy calico. Easy going, perfect for little kids. Then came Tigger the grouch, (we had photo ops of grown men trying to brush out his matted hair be gloved and those growls would raise the hair on your head)! He once circled a friend growling who happened to have put on a devil horn headband for Halloween, she flung it on the ground and he pounced on that thing, ripping it to shreds. Missy the Siamese, delicate and a tad aloof, watched from her perch. My very first cat on my own was Mama Kitty who lived 28 years people. My vet actually checked the world book of Guinness records, alas 31 years in Russia won. She picked me as I walked through the Humane Society, first one paw grasped my shoulder on the way in, and as I carried my cute black kitten Mooner out, she grabbed me with both paws. You can't say no to that, she was already a year old, small, skinny gray Tabby, with piercing green eyes. I named her Bug, but she started carrying the kitten around, so ended up Mama K. She would wail if you closed a door until you opened it, she was difficult and I had roommates, so one night I had to tell her, if this does not stop I have to take you back, I cried hard, she never wailed again. As you can imagine 27 years of stories I have, she lived in every place I ever did, Colorado, MN, Iowa, she had to be tranquilized for those big moves. She would travel on my shoulders, she had specific meows for different things, and was a talker and lover of any human that rested at my doorstep. She caught snakes, and ate hundreds of grasshoppers. She lived to see my second son born. She had not meowed in 2 years, had really no teeth left, and then lived only in the downstairs bathroom, as that got the most use, so she could still get her pets in. Finally she was only a couple of pounds, I held her head so she could drink water, she no longer ate. We were moving to another home which was still under renovation, so had to hotel it for a month. As we drove her in to the vet, she meowed to say goodbye, my hubby and I both cried our hearts out, for this beautiful, sweet feline. We have had regal Winston, the blue Russian given to us by my bro, and Target the skittish, rarely did anyone see this cat, but then again, he did have a bullseye pattern on each side of his body. They both left for separate homes once it became clear they had issues with each other and my carpet. We had Sweet Pea, found up a tree by my hubby, who brought him to church to show what he got for us! She was a lover too and got along sort of ok with the dog. She once kept eye contact with me while I was on the phone, jumped on the counter and into the sink and then peed. I ran down to see her rock hard litter box had not been tended to....yep very clear messages! Then we brought in Whiskers, who had been dumped on our farm 8 years ago, he hacked, and lived in the garage and barns. After he became the only cat outside we brought him inside, he loved our dog so much, he never wanted to leave his side. That cat was by far the biggest lover of the bunch. He got ill in nine months in and when I took him in they said "she" had a very contagious feline disease and needed to be put down immediately, it was painful. I was distraught with the unexpected news, I actually got lost going home. Then wondered if that is what happened to the other outdoor cats, but this cat hacked since day one and made it 9 years here. Coyotes we assumed had gotten the others. Sounds harsh, but the circle of life is harsh at times. For two long years I had no kitties, it was to honor our 16 year old doggie Bear, who deserved to have our full attention. But it was hard, as I am a cat person. Then we went to the shelter and got ourselves Boo on my youngest birthday. Huge black cat, that scratched my son as it lept out of the box in the car and then proceeded to pee and poo on Papa in the front seat. It was not a pleasant ride home, but we did not give up. She started to acclimate but the drive to the vet put her back. She had been abused no doubt by a male, hid under beds, would not come downstairs for a month. Slowly she came around, her fur got soft, she slid under the covers, she played! She now will ask you to brush her out, she won't hide when guests come over. She does not like change, but forgives quicker than most. She is a delight. Ahhh, I love how nature's beasts will allow us humans to play with them, love on them. They become such a part of our experiences, we can't imagine to have had a life without them. I am so very glad I am not allergic! Some of you like dogs better, I get it, I love them too, but cats will make you keep your wits about you! The vacation euphoria has finally waned and reality of daily grind has smacked me around a bit. I can tough things out normally, you get attuned to the ebbs and flows of life, but last night I vapor locked as my hubby calls it. I was the deer in the headlights. I could not complete sentences. The bubble I surround myself with burst and all I could do was go to bed and see what I woke up to.
It wasn't like I was diagnosed with some fatal disease. It was the culmination of my own emotional energies around a wide variety of situations and tasks coming at me. A lovely woman from work died leaving her 12 year old son with no parent, I prayed for that boy and cried for him. She was younger than myself, and you feel that" live your dash" tugging at you. A man that used to come to our church passed away, and they needed to use our church for the memorial, we have no pastor currently, so it is a bit of a flurry to get organized, and I wondered about him and his life. We are currently working with Mayo clinic to help a loved one deal with deciphering what physical and mental issues need to be addressed. So many forms and processes to maneuver through. Relatives want this and then that, can you do this? Car needs to get fixed and an oil change. We need groceries, pay bills, need to weedwack those weeds. I need to clean and get ready to host a wedding shower, and looking at the "office mess" put me right over that edge. I wanted to help at VBS this year....Good grief, get a grip girl, this is not that big of a deal! But my brain, my emotions said slow down, your going too fast, you got to make the morning last girl. I love that groovy song. So before I woke up I asked God, Jesus, the Holy Spirit, my Angels, Spirit Guides, my Moms, Sis, Friends all in another slice of this or some other dimension to help me, and then I wrote it out here, and that helps. I heard don't overthink it, step back and just be. So I can see the sunshine coming through the doorway now, asking me to just go stare at the bugs flying in the light for a few moments, birds chatting, and breathe deeply, give those emotions some time to express themselves, breathe. Dang if Chaos and my bubble didn't collide again. I am grateful for the warning, and the remembrance that the light always soothes my soul, and I can feel I am on way back to some emotional balance for today anyway. I am also going to find some good old tunes to listen to later, those oldies help my emotions find their place. It would also be wise to ask and accept help from those in my own slice of dimension, yes Ma'am, now another piece falls into place! Traveling away from the farm and normal routines expands ones horizons and is just good for the soul. This vacation got me to a really good place. It was a joy and only one moment of spousal discord while we adjusted to be "around each other so much". We unwound, relaxed, no schedules, we meandered daily on foot all over Charleston. Four miles a day felt so good. Explored the creativity of humans here, in art, antiques, food, clothing, and the joy of children splashing in the fountains, laughter, being on sea water, watching HGTV when it was hot and napping, see my hubby finally RELAX, it was all spectacular! I am still pumped a week later.
I am a curious creature by nature. I love the feeling of wonder and and my place in it. Everything that surrounds us is magical much of the time, and the creator of all this, well just WOW! I am so humbled and enthralled to be alive right now. How perfectly imperfectness creates such diversity, it goes beyond my ability to digest it in my thoughts at times, also perfect, because it probably should not even be thought about, just breathed in and breathed out. It feels like Wheeee! Have you ever felt like the past, present and future are all right now? I had that feeling, I wish I could be eloquent in explaining it, it's so cool. While the history of places and people sort of merge with the movement of natural surroundings and the faces you see, and the feeling of hope is generated by those faces and the changes around you, and you just know it is all good and all will be OK. For all the angst in the world, it feels like in every moment there is the flow of goodness bubbling up and moving us in the right direction, contrary to what we normally hear I know! I experienced an air craft carrier, crawled inside the Apollo 8 capsule, and submerged myself in a submarine. It was a tad exhausting realizing what happened in these spaces and to the people in them. I also felt an appreciation for the challenges the human spirit encounters and how we find a way to survive and even thrive. I am however, not a fan of conflict. Sea life is precious. Dolphins playing around the harbor, storks diving into the water, bugs flying around as the waves ebb and flow, lap and crash into the rocks. Sitting on the swing on the pier, swaying with the ocean breeze, snuggled up to my honey, eyes closed, and listening to sounds of this place, was the perfect end to our time there. Just ahhhh. Coming back to work at home and the job is just fine too. I feel good, more content. I highly recommend getting away to explore, even if it is the arboretum down the dusty road (which I have done since I got back, to get the nature nurture again) as things have "popped" up to deal with again. Nature soothes my soul, and I had forgotten that gift. Yay for today! I wish I could give you this gift, you deserve it! Well I just learned a life lesson, I am not really good at implementing or fixing things. Three farm houses and an old building later. I thought I could not afford good help, as we had many other expenses. What I did not take into consideration is the time I spend researching, talking about it, thinking about it, then forcing myself to take the plunge and just do it. I never valued my time near enough. Now it is very hard to find people willing to take on those little but big to me jobs. Old farmhouses need help with old "ways and materials" to fix them. So here I am again, filling in cracks in walls, floors, and jacking up this or that. I refinished 100 year old 10 ft front double doors, so scary. It takes me way too long, and it is tiring getting up and down ladders, my feet and bum get sore now. The walls are 11 ft high on both floors, I have painted every room. Lord, just the spring cleaning I got half done, made my arms sore for days. Spring chicken soup I say.
I have reupholstered four chairs, made all the curtains in my house, because the windows are tall, and non-standard. No I don't sew, I can only do straight lines and maybe some Halloween costumes that's it. I glued two rocking chairs, that did not work out real well. I finally gave away much of the furniture that needs fixing, to those who will use it for something, after 20 odd years. Beautiful wood, which is why I wanted to "save" it anyway! It is sad to say, but country life does not lend itself to convenient recycling curbside pick up. You haul your bags to some bin miles away, so you always have cans and plastic rumbling around your back seat or trunk. I stopped for about a year after they took away the closer bin, I was fed up, but then the planet spoke to me and I apologized. The junkin craze is awesome. I have been a purging princess, readying for a some day retirement move to a much smaller, easy to maintain place to call home, now that the off spring are almost really gone. However, I still s find old but new to me items call my name, sometimes the deals are so good, I can't resist. So this just happened for example on my fixer upper prowess....one piece of cement board slid down off the middle of one outdoor wall. I got two shimmy's and ladder, stuck them in to hold it till we could get a nail gun. Well two weeks later the siding piece fell down and broke. Special order two 12 ft pieces (just in case, needed 10 ft) a week later, it's so windy I can't just put in the truck, have to get help to trailer them home from the city, our trailer is busy. My nail gun got loaned out, so now need special screws. Also a saw with special blade to cut it. Lovely neighbor comes over to bring some screws and saw to help, then says I painted the board before we put up, two coats, but I did the wrong flipping side of it. Hubby has to step in now. I don't have vulcum caulk and I see yet another trouble spot..... Hours of my life, one piece of siding (to date), I have never wanted a shot and cigarette so badly in my life. AND Someone can come and kill all these blooming ants with napalm at this point, the peppermint essential oil mixture did not work, nor the syrup on cardboard, and some bug spray I found in the basement. Deep, deep breaths, ok, they are just little ol ants and have every right to be here. I do now know in the big scheme of things, I never want to tackle a fix it project again, I am toast. Dearest universe, I love you, please make it be so. I swear to do my best to leave a small carbon footprint. Technology is a heavy sigh. It displays in so many ways its disdain for me. I am in a black hole of time and space. One in which even the simplest change in technology my brain bypasses any depth of understanding. The hashtag for example, it is everywhere, seems like a marketing ploy, and I thought it was just for Instagram, which I don't use of course. But then I was told you should be using it on your blog. I don't write like that #blog#nohashtag#hell. Now watch, a year from now I'll be doing it. I am a slow poke.
Living in the country, we had one option for internet originally, it was a dish mounted on our roof, pointing towards some unseen satellite, or maybe it was a thingy on top of the towns grain silo's. The dish is still there, but now we have an underground line, and they did not want the dish back, how does one recycle that? I have a modem too. Then it all stops in an instant. Demonic activity. I call and hear your modem is bad, they send another one, which does not work and then a tech guy comes out, and nope the line has been eaten by rabbits. Happened more than once. Since I work from home, and so does my hubby, this causes great stress in a marriage. God forbid should the actual computer or any of its programs go haywire. Really, I just need the basics, a Microsoft package for dummies please. I don't think much less talk this language. I know two people who will still help us, our kids are no better, they didn't inherit this gene (that is how bad our gene's are). We feel like sitting ducks, at some point, it is going to happen, again. Don't even talk about security and being invaded. Too many options for things. We can't figure out how to re-hook up our Wii, which is how we got Netflix, for months now. So many wires back there. I bought some antenna thing for our TV, but I still only get some channels, (no cable), and those channels change when a strong wind goes thru, and upstairs is different than downstairs, nothing makes any sense! Working from home, is the same, please don't upgrade me. They asked me to review my teams access to various tools, but the words were in tech codes, I told them unless they can say in English what that relates to I can't help them. I have an android phone (yes I used the word android for the first time right here), not an I phone, so sometimes my response to group messages only goes back to one person, it confuses people. I don't care really. Two months ago I tried my first phone game, it is wordscapes, it is addicting and I need to stop, don't start these games! I tried snap chat for a few days, ya no. Although taking a selfie in a fuzzy rosy way, makes me look years younger, I can see the appeal. Outside of cell phone, Facebook and my email, that is enough for these brain cells. Facebook is even starting to get weary. Too much the same. I have to take breaks from it. I have not changed my profile picture in six years, I am in my Cruella DeVille Halloween outfit, I still like it, don't see a need to change. I sound like an old person, but I have always been this way. Even in my car, a friend recently asked me what is this button for, do you know, I had no idea, been four years and again, I don't have On star, or SiriusXM, and who ever reads the manual. I want a car to get me from point a to b, in comfy style preferable, but living on gravel, why bother, everyone knows where my car is, the one covered in very thick dust. Truly my car is one of a million of the exact same in Iowa, and they will say, I see you were here, I don't recall seeing them, no they saw my car, truth. 60 minutes showed how much waste all the fast changing technology produces. I just recycled an entire laundry basket full of wires, ear phones, plug ins, I have no idea where they came from. I pray all my surge protectors are still good, do they have a life expectancy? I can't imagine having a smart refrigerator, I don't want to talk to it or it to me. It is a big cold box. Well at least it's summer now, I should be safe from hungry rodents. I would rather sit under a tree and have a nice chat with you, if you follow science, you would know trees speak to each other without technology at all. Where is the truth? Some say never in our history have we had such a difficult time discerning the truth. I am not sure. Initially I think yes, because even in science what was awful for you years ago is now proven to be the opposite. Researchers lied to get their product to profit. Have your babies sleep on their backs or stomachs. There is another planet in our universe. I read Scientific Journal when I travel, it's a thing, and Quantum physics is mind blowing, you should read a bit on that. I love that that science and our spirituality seem to be converging closer than ever before. Still, the sheer volume of so called knowledge is overwhelming, how does one determine truth for themselves.
Our own country's history taught today does not take into account new facts and we are not that old. That one baffles me, we can't seem to fix the books going back a couple of hundred years? Plus let's look at education, teachers have opinions, they relay those to students by word or body language, on purpose or not, good or bad, it can influence the truth. We jam learning into a one way box, yet we humans are as different as can be, seems our educational system should accommodate that by now. Look at your own family history, five kids, each with very different views on how they grew up and what happened. We don't see things the same way. Our courts know for a fact that people can't remember shit. Time and again, we incarcerate innocent people. Lie detectors work on some, not all. Judges can be corrupt too, so can police, so can fireman, so can service men and women, the list goes on and on. All those we like to hold up as a model of ethics and humanity, are not all as they seem. We have a tendency to want to glorify people. Every person has value. Even if i don't agree with you, and there are many of you, can I still see value? Religion is a whole myriad of fact and fiction and interpretations. I don't care what religion you are or are not, human decency, empathy and loving kindness tell me all I need to know about a person, and how I choose to interact. The rest is between you and your God. We love to judge everyone and everything, and yet look at us, look inside ourselves. Can you honestly say you have never lied, never contemplated something awful in anger, been wrong, very, very wrong. Yet others still love us. Why cant we extend the same to those who oppose our views. Your "moments" of greatness or failure don't define who you are in total, and that is the truth. I have heard only two emotions drive our actions, Love or Fear, the more I contemplate that, the more it makes sense. We are all in the same boat, same planet. I love to quote a dear love filled friend, who also quotes this "Row, row, row YOUR boat, GENTLY down the stream, merrily, merrily, merrily, LIFE IS BUT A DREAM". If you believe in your soul, and that this experience is part of your souls everlasting journey, well why make it so hard! I am sucking wind just like the rest of you. I had a moment once, I left my newborn son in his car seat in my driveway and drove away. I was on my way to see my dying Mom, hormones and sleep deprivation, plus the stress of my Mom getting ready to leave me, I was not in my right mind. A block away, my hubby calls, told me, and I almost got ill, the terror of that moment still lingers, I could have ran over him backing out. So months later when I read about a women who left her child in a hot car and they suffered the most horrible outcome, my heart poured out for her. Yes, my initial reaction was how could she, then I recalled my moment. By Love's grace, I did not end up on the front page of the newspaper. Look at all the moments we have, they encompass such a wide path of truth and perception, sometimes you have to wonder is this life really real! Knowing change is the only constant, that energy is our constant in some changing form, we must be willing to go with the flow, let it take it's course. I don't have to be right, you don't have to be right, we are still loved in all our conflict, our imperfections, I fight my little ego wanting to being right! My perceptions will surely not be yours, it is impossible, this is our unique journey, because we are. So I try and dwell in that love that connects us all, till I feel it, know it and can offer the grace I have been given. We are a changing..... but all so beautifully us. I once asked my Peeps, to share with me the moment they knew or had their Ah Ha experience with the Divine, or that life goes on for us after we leave this planet. It was fascinating how ordinary the fact is, that most of us have these experiences, yet seldom share these profound moments.
While most of us relate the twilight zone to the television series, for me the name is so cool in that twilight is that magical time in story telling, we are always drawn to sunrises and especially sun sets, and there is nothing quite like "being in the zone". So alluring and enlightening. Faith in something, comes easier as time goes by and you have some experiences to draw from. Let's face it once you have an otherworldly event, it makes you pay attention and often creates a space in your heart, for your soul and other souls to get through to you. Both of my parents came to me just moments before they died. Their passing's were imminent, but I was miles away, and at 1:30 am for my Dad, and while driving my newborn up mid day to for Mom, I just heard them, without words, and me without "thinking", I automatically said both times out loud, it is ok to go now, I don't need to be there. I could even tell my sister the exact time my Mom died. I have had two times that a dear friend and my sister call me up and say "what is happening to you", I can't sleep your face keeps popping up in my brain, or I have been having dreams about you that make me feel like you need help. Both times I was in a very dark moment, distraught and scared. Their calls at that moment gave me such hope that all would be well. My hubby on his last day of chemo, had a elderly woman come to him and hold his hand, unusual, tell him tonight was going to me the worst night of his life, so she wanted him to think of his four buddies, and put them on a stage, dressed like the Village People, singing YMCA, that would help him take his mind off the pain and to not give up. I can vouch that was the worst day of his life, and he went back to thank the woman, but she did not exist, there was never an elderly woman who worked or volunteered there. He said at that moment he just "knew" she was an angel (he did not even tell me this story for two years). Some of my friends stories I have to share. One woman at the age of 17 was standing on a bridge ready to jump to her death, and heard a deep voice, which said "You don't have to do this", she turned to see who said it, the bridge was empty, but she stepped back. This friend fell asleep at the wheel and got into a terrible wreck and the only thing that saved him and his companion from going over a steep ravine, was he hit a large downed limb by a tree. Another buddy worked at the auto body shop his car was taken to, went to the crash site, there was no tree or limb in sight, but you could clearly see where the car stopped before going over the edge, yet the car showed tree damage. My husband passed away and we had a standing joke about nickels. Whenever I am feeling his loss, a nickel shows up, all by itself, in places nickels just don't show up, who ever places change on the back of a toilet. That one made me laugh, he had a wicked sense of humor. There are more stories to share........ones that make you wonder if recreational drinks or other such things were involved ,not, but I think that needs another chapter. What I know for myself is this, communication happens from beyond our reality without a doubt. It happens every day. All faiths prove this out. The energy of our universe and the love frequency that binds us all together allows for miracles big and small to happen as a matter of course. We are loved beyond our comprehension. What a wonderful world indeed. |
Life on GravelAbout the AuthorCity girl sharing stories of a life full of country glitter and other shit. Archives
March 2020
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